Independence

You hid the hope in cloudy crystal,
like a mosquito in the amber.

You shaped the jewels and clipped them on their chains.
One you put around your neck and one, hard-handed, round mine.

Your hope is independence, I thought you said.
It broke my heart to leave you but now I’m strong.

How many heartbeats

How many heartbeats in a lifetime?
How many can I save for you?

In ancient times it was believed that, illness and violence permitting, you lived until your heart had beat a certain number of times. I think I read somewhere recently that scientists had found some evidence for this.

My heart races, chases, races when I am with you.
I feel my box of heartbeats ebb towards empty.

It makes sense I suppose. All other things being equal, heart muscle bumps and thumps until it tires, slows (perhaps) and stops.

I lie, relax and stretch when I know you will not be with me.
I feel my chest rise, fall, rise again. I feel the heartbeat slow.

Because, you see, if I don’t use too many heartbeats when you are not here, I have more to use when you are.

I’m saving all my love for you. My love.
I’m saving all my heart for you. My love.

*****

How many heartbeats in a lifetime?
How many can I save for you?

My heart races, chases, races when I am with you.
I feel my box of heartbeats ebb towards empty.

I lie, relax and stretch when I know you will not be with me.
I feel my chest rise, fall, rise again. I feel the heartbeat slow.

I’m saving all my love for you. My love.
I’m saving all my heart for you. My love.